im sitting here in the library of a little hood town listening to this man continually read the same line in a poem over and over i now know he does not like mexicans and if i was a mexican i might even be insulted.
i want to let someone know that i wish i could be the girl that sparkles in there eyes and left them filled with hope love and surprise.
in these last two weeks along i have had my heart broken, used, trampled, confused, re-built, filled and back to confused. im happy to say that at the very least i know there is love. it may not take every perfect form i wish it would but i know its there in the good and in the bad and for that alone i am grateful.
i have a friend whom i hope knows that i love deeply and dearly and that when the lone wolf runs its own course that this tiny dancer will be right here to hear the stories of the loves lost and gained and the stories filled with adventure. i know ive already lost myself in you my lone wolf partly and am here for you whole heartedly.
Spontaneous, combustible, disastrous, sporadic, erratic, electric and i think your forgot nomadic....
i spent my first weekend at home this weekend. and it was plenty more than what i hoped it would be. i ate cakes, cookies, and brownies. all baked with love and laughter with an amazing friend. i made beautiful candi and got to make chalk drawings on my wall all the while smiling about it all. im so blessed to have a friend who is willing to take trains and walk to pay me a visit just to keep with our weekly tradition. i love you.
never in my life have i ever noticed how amazing the human body is before. now that im interested in dancing i pay closer attention than ever before to how my body bends and pops and snaps and moves and flows. how each of my joints bends and how my muscles constrict and loosen up. im so grateful for the ability to move all of my limbs.
now young ladies if any read this at all ever. start to fucking value yourself. you are worth more than that stupid little boy will ever truly know. stop selling yourself short and dont think just know you deserve more than what is being handed to you. young lady remember that you do deserve to get a compliment and that you should never allow him to think your dreams are stupid or foolish. and most of all you deserve to be loved for more than your cover its the pages of who you are that count. and dont you dare young lady love a book for his cover take the time to be his friend to read his pages and not only read the pages but look for the subtext of his text. get to know how he treats his mom and dad get to know his friends hell dont be a bitter lil child and if u run into one of his exs be kind and polite see why it didnt work from both sides of the story. trust that you know what is best for yourself dont stay in a shitty relationship to keep him happy. cause a good relationship is based on equal amounts of happiness. but before you jump into a relationship form a solid friendship. a friendship is more important than anything else. and dont worry about love it will always be there if there is a genuine friendship. and allow love to take its own course just dont let it consume you and forget that there is life besides love in a relationship. there is love and life in all friendships. young lady remember that you are to be treated as an equal in every friendship.
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